Lincoln Blogs


Actual Label Instructions on Consumer Goods
June 3, 2007, 7:30 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (I bet there is a good story behind that!)

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special?)

On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): “Do not turn upside down.” (A little late for that!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: “Product will be hot after heating.” (And you thought…???)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: “Do not iron clothes on body.” (But wouldn’t this save me more time?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: “Serving suggestion: Defrost.” (But it’s just a suggestion).

On Boot’s Children Cough Medicine: “Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.” (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: “Warning: May cause drowsiness.” (and I’m taking this because…???)

On most brands of Christmas lights: “For indoor or outdoor use only.” (As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor: “Not to be used for the other use.” (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I’m a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury’s peanuts: “Warning: contains nuts.” (Talk about a news flash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: “Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.” (Step 3: Maybe, uh … fly Delta?)

On a child’s superman costume: “Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.” (Rats!)

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lol

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